Well, it’s 2021 & I haven’t written or shared here for a looooooooong, long time.
2020 was one helluva year, so I’m gonna plead “Pandemic” here & say that I definitely didn’t put writing for pleasure above anything last year.
I’m back today because writing has always healed me & helped steel me when it comes to changing tides & changing worlds.
Today was a rough day.
Well, I booked tickets home to the USA last Octiber with plans to arrive in California on April 1st, 2021. I’ve been holding on to Hope for months now that I’d see my parents & brother again. Soon.
I’ve been counting down the days like a kid does with a birthday or Christmastime.
Hope has taken a punch to the gut today though.
Heartbroken doesn’t even begin to explain how I’m feeling.
To work through & process a litany of emotions that coincided with cancelling my flights, I went running & ugly cried the whole way.
I talked to local redwoods.
I wore the weight of the closed borders like chains around my heart.
Right now I miss a lot about home.
I miss hugging my family.
I miss homemade ice cream on Uncle Alan’s farm.
I miss Missouri backroads (the ones that know me better than I know them).
I miss Californian sunsets & beer with friends.
Hopefully things will change soon.
Until then, it’ll be FaceTime & Zoom & Messenger & the longing.
I hope that we treat each other with kindness & compassion this year.
You never know what another human is going through.
Who they’re missing.
Who they’re longing for.